The Life I Think About

I tend to think a lot. To wonder. Many different things cross my mind on a given day. I wonder what I’ll have for dinner. I think about how creepy that movie was that I watched last week. I wonder how things will go tomorrow night. I question how God can really love me despite how messed up I am. I think about the life that I want to have.

That last thought, about the life I want to have, is one I wish I spent more time on. I guess sometimes life can get pretty mundane. I know sometimes I’ll look at the calendar and ask where has the last month/week/hour gone. Life can just happen to you if you let it.

When I find myself thinking about my life, I tend to ask God if this is the life He has in store for me. Is a routine life what He came to give me?

I am reminded of Jesus saying something about coming to give an abundant life. A life to the fullest is how some translations read. I don’t think Jesus meant that as far as giving me material things. He’s a deeper person than that. I think He’s talking about a life of meaning.

Giving a life of significance. Something untamed.

A life filled with love, and passion, and adventure, and risks, and truth, and laughter.

If I am truthful with myself, that’s the kind of life my heart yearns for. I don’t really get excited about a neat, arranged, mundane life. I was not meant to live a life where I’m just going through the motions. Honestly, I think that’s the life most of us have settled for. We walk around sort of in a haze, just letting life happen. We have jobs, we have families; we have ordinary non-passionate life.

Don’t get me wrong, jobs and families are great things. I believe in work and I strongly believe in families. I have friends that work 70 plus hours a week and they are completely drained. That can be fine and all especially if you love your job. But I don’t think that’s the case most of the time. I think we do it because we don’t know what else there is to do. We’ve settled for a life where it’s just about getting ahead and surviving rather than living life to the fullest. We are existing for this boring, dutiful, neat life. But I don’t believe that life should be boring or dutiful or neat at all.

I want to live the life that Jesus came to give. Sure, I want to work but I know I am more than my work. Sure, it’d be fine to increase my wealth. But I think I meant for more than a life that’s just fine. And I know that there’s more to life than just material things. So I am going to pursue that life that my soul cries out for, not just think about it. The kind of life that I was created for. The abundant, full kind of life that Jesus came to give. I hope you can do the same.